I don’t know how many times I went outside with the Budster today. Too many to count. At one time he came over to my desk and barked. I told him we had just come back inside and he didn’t need to go out again. He barked again…and again. We went outside. With all the rain we have gotten, our yard is a swamp. I have to wear my muck boots when I go out there and Buddy always wants to walk around the entire front yard. He pauses periodically and looks into the distance. He even checks underneath the car and wants to go over to the shelter. I know what he’s doing and it’s painful to watch as he looks for Annie. He has even taken to walking through the house and checking Annie’s old haunts, the hall bathroom, the laundry room and by the front door.
Duchess has burrowed herself under the dining room table. It’s normally her place to lay but she would come out when we called or coaxed her into the other room with us. It’s like pulling teeth to get her to come out now but we do whatever it takes to help her. When she does come out, she will lean against us and press her face close with a look that says, “Fix it please,” but we don’t know how. We just do the best that we can to fill the hole in her heart with all the love that we have.
Annie was with us a very long time and it could take at least as long to work through this. So, in the meantime, I will be getting more exercise walking around the front yard with Buddy, day and night. I’ll do it as long as it takes and I don’t mind at all. We’ll stay close to Duchess and help her find her way. Joy and I try to do the same for each other and we know that we can depend on people who know what to do.
The Missus drives a Buick. It needs a lot of work and for obvious reasons we will not be taking it to a Toyota dealership for repairs. We will take it to a GM dealer because they will know what to do. I’m pretty good with a set of wrenches and I know a decent general mechanic if I need him but there are some things that should only be trusted to the manufacturer. Are you making the connection?
We aren’t machines where we can call in a mechanic to fix a problem. We are complex beings, sometimes with complex issues that require complex solutions. People with good intentions periodically offer good advice but under these circumstances even they will recommend that we reach out to our Elohim, our Creator. They can pick us up and carry us but what do we say when we get there? Words cannot express…
Romans 8:26 (NET Bible)
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness, for we do not know how we should pray, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with inexpressible groanings.
When there are no words, and there rarely are in times like these, just lay it all on the altar. He’ll know what to do. He’ll know how to fix it.
We’ll scoot over and make room for the Duchess, the Budster and Mumford.